Pregnancy- The Beginning.

Okay so I had been with my boyfriend, Efrain, for less than a year. I was on oral contraceptives, but honestly I started to get a little lazy with it. Why? I don't know. Wasn't I scared of getting pregnant? Well, idk. I had mixed feelings about it. I loved him soo much, and I knew that he loved me. We knew that we would always be together.. and I know a lot of people say that and it never happens.... but it was seriously like a serious love.. and we felt like soul mates. We are like the same person on the inside. Anyway, so yeah, we did it. Was I using protection? I guess I don't know. It was like, whatever happens happens I guess, and I knew we would be okay either way. We both wanted kids eventually... and so whatever. There was one particular day when I was pretty sure that something unintentionally happened.. so I saved the date. 14 days later, I bought a home pregnancy test (and I had already been thru like a hundred of them) and low and behold! Positive. I was in the bathroom at my parents house. My mom knew what I was doing, so she waited in my bedroom for me to come out with the results. Although it was an almost purposeful pregnancy, I came out of the bathroom terrified and crying. It was actually happening... I WAS pregnant. Something that I cannot take back and is not going away anytime soon. I do not believe in abortion... and I don't think I could live with an adoption. I knew what I was going to do from day one. She was Mine. 

The first thing I did was called my really good friend Amber. She's been through the same thing, but unfortunately did not get as much support from her son's father as I fortunately did from my daughter's father. She was really encouraging and helped me through the initial shock. Then my boyfriend. I called him, and surprisingly He was soooo happy and excited. For probably the first three months he had enough excitement for the both of us.  He just could not contain himself with the fact that he would be a father.

So we went through my initial appointments and ultrasounds and after some initial confusion everything seemed to be going completely normally. For me, the pregnant mother however, it sucked. Pregnancy was nothing to be looking forward to. I had zero appetite, I was nauseous 24/7, and I threw up like 85% of everything I ate. In the first 8 weeks I lost like 10 pounds. Efrain was constantly bitching at me to eat... he wanted to shove as much food into me as possible to make our baby big and strong. I was not pleased at his constant nagging, and to make it worse, I pretty much felt like I had pms all the time so I was just always irritated with everyone. I feel bad now, and looking back on it I can see that Efrain was usually the number one victim to my irritability. It didn't help that there was always a tiny bit of a language barrier that would prove difficult to get my feelings across. 

After those first two months, I suddenly wanted to eat everything, and I started gaining weight normally. I think I gained a total of 19 or 20 pounds. I'm only like 5 feet tall, and only weighed a little over 100lbs to begin with, so this was kind of significant for me. At 18 weeks I was like WAY excited to find out if I was having a boy or a girl. So my mom, my sister Heidi (also my bestest friend), and Efrain all piled into the ultrasound room to discover that I was having a GIRL!! I was SOOO excited and I hit Efrain sooo hard (it was almost like a contest to prove what we were having... i won). I immediately started picking out names and buying clothes. At the same time, Efrain's sister discovered she was going to have a boy. 

So this was the first few months of my pregnancy. I think I started to show like at 4 months. The upcoming months were worse than I could have expected.